falling down
going down
again

not one of my good days.

was stony the entire day
academic results took a nosedive along with self esteem and everything else
just like it always does eventually.

and its not like theres anyone to say this to.
oh god do i sound like Kingshaw or what.

t i r e d
of smiling
of laughing
of talking
of thinking
of moving
of studying
of switching on and off my mobile 5 times (and counting) today
of the guilt
of the competition
of the stress
of trying to be nice
of trying to contain all these inside
of waiting

all i want to do now is to lie on a patch of um grass and never get nudged awake by any ass.

Don't tell me what to think
Cause I don't care this time
Don't tell me what you believe
Cause you won't be there
To catch me when I fall
But you'll need me when I'm not here at all
Miss me when I'm gone again, yeah

I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again, yeah
I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again

Don't tell me how life is
Cause I don't really want to know
Don't tell me how this game ends
Cause we'll just see how it goes
Catch me when I fall
Or you'll need me when I'm not here at all
Miss me when I'm gone again, yeah

I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again, yeah
I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again, yeah

Now, I'm all the way down here
I'm falling
I'm all the way down here
I'm falling down again
I'm falling down
I'm falling down
I'm falling down

I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again,
I'm going down in flames
I'm falling into this again

Now, I'm all the way down here
I'm falling
All the way
All the way down here
I'm falling down again now
I'm falling down

i really dont want to think
ive impugned you,
just like what i think of everyone else now.

nana
dont you wish everything was simple and plain? that everything was written out in black and white so that we could refer to them as proof that we think too much? that people really dont mean what they say? that we shouldve been cynical to every single kind of relationship? that there were lines that scream DO NOT CROSS, you can never afford the agony it brings? yea tell me i sound stupid and funny but its true. maybe there is a guidebook for life somewhere. and i think this is what the guidebook says : because all crap like love and friendship are stories made up to decieve us. because its an evil plot to guile us like the big bad wolf in little red riding hood. because everything is a lie. because its an evil joke turned nasty. because nothing lasts forever. and its contrasts entirely with what we had naively believed in. because things change all the time. rapidly. and that is why nobody is ever happy. that is why people write songs about how happy they are with their lives but later write another song about how miserable their lives are. that is why there are more sappy sad songs than irritatingly happy songs. but within myself a little voice tells me that the guidebook may be wrong. maybe there's hope for this melee crowd we all belong to. maybe maybe. and maybe everything happens for a reason. maybe it is for us to be happy after all.
:) love you, stupid bitch.
and yes, you think too much.
but so do i.

um.
i think i shall go study ss.
SEE WHAT I MEAN??!
argh. the government and everyone else should really give the students a break
-pulls long face-
okay im not so pissed anymore.
maybe i shall
off my mobile again ..
and hopefully on it again like, at 9?
i know im not making sense
like i always dont
haha.